


Interviewing a Vampire

by Grevling



Category: Carmilla (Web Series)
Genre: F/F, Misses Clause Challenge
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2014-12-20
Updated: 2014-12-20
Packaged: 2018-03-02 11:29:56
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,524
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/2810561
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Grevling/pseuds/Grevling
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>There is a reason why Laura is a Journalism major, and at least 70% of it is because she can't stop asking questions. Like, ever.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Interviewing a Vampire

**Author's Note:**

  * For [kef](https://archiveofourown.org/users/kef/gifts).



> Happy Yuletide, Kef! I hope this satisfies - I love this webseries so much, but there's so much they never went into or discussed, so I did a little filling in of the blanks on my own.

**Day One**

Okay so MAYBE it started out with a little bit of research gone awry, but when the first sixteen pages of _'my roommate is a vampire and i have her tied up in my dorm room what do i do'_ typed frantically into Google don’t turn up anything useful you start to get a bit desperate, you know?

It was only when she realized she had twenty-one tabs open, all documenting variously questionably legitimate ‘accounts’ of ‘encounters’ with ‘seductive creatures of the night’ (and yes, every single one of those scare quotes was entirely necessary for her continued sanity thank you) that Laura realized she should probably turn SafeSearch back on and try to forget any of this ever happened.

Unfortunately, Laura is not exactly known for making the smartest decisions ever.

**\---------------**

“So, is sucking blood, like, foreplay to you? Or is it a separate sort of activity from the seduction of virgins?”

Thankfully, they're alone, which is not always the case when Laura gets one of her bouts of verbal diarrhea. It’s especially fortuitous because Laura can’t seem to stop now that she’s gotten herself started.

“I mean, I figure it doesn’t have anything to do with the actual sucking mechanism, unless you've got a sippy cup somewhere I don't know about, but does it actually make you feel good? Or could you, like, I don't know, take an iron supplement instead?" She's on a roll now, scrolling down purple-highlighted links to blogs and supernatural 'research' websites, rattling off everything she can remember from all the fanfic read through half-closed eyes, cursor hovering over the back button. "Seriously, what does blood even taste like to you? Do humans and animals taste different? Can you tell the difference between blood types? Is AB, like, a delicacy?"

Carmilla slumps even further down against the ropes holding her to the desk chair, and rolls her head slowly around so that she can glare darkly at Laura, who blushes fiercely at the scrutiny but doesn't back down. Carmilla finally huffs and looks away again in silence.

Laura throws up her hands. "Ugh, whatever. It was just a thought." She shrugs and turns back to Google. The internet has never failed her before, and she’s determined that it won’t this time either. "You have fun over there by yourself, Miss Strong-and-Silent. _I'm_ gonna figure out what your deal is and rescue everyone without your help!"

She resists the urge to stick her tongue out at Carmilla, but it's a close thing.

 

**Day Three**

"Seriously, though, how are you actually the most ineffective vampire the world has ever seen?"

Laura's perched on Carmilla's bed this time, rummaging through the stuff on her shelf in search of clues. What a clue might look like, she has no idea, but she's pretty sure this is what Buffy would do in this situation (well, right before flirting with the vampire, but she might skip that step). She glances over at said vampire just in time to see her roll her eyes in Laura's direction.

"What? It's true! Every single one of your pseudonyms is a weak anagram of your first name, you dress like you've never heard of any color but black, and for god's sake you even buy Chokoa Crunch cereal and _keep blood inside the dorm fridge_. I have no idea how you haven't been caught before now." Laura's prying open a suspiciously rattly box that she found on Carmilla's headboard while she rants, but the only thing she finds inside are a large assortment of rings and leather cuffs. She scoffs. So much for the whole silver-as-a-weapon-against evil idea.

Laura jerks her head up as Carmilla clears her throat, tongue rasping drily over her lips. Is she finally going to get some answers from her stupid stubborn vampire roommate? She leans in eagerly as Carmilla croaks, in a bare whisper of a voice rusty with disuse, "Did it ever occur to you that I wanted to be discovered? That I never wanted to hide in the first place?” Her eyes stare straight into Laura’s, gaze steady on something other that the floor for the first time since she was captured.

Laura jerks back and wrinkles her nose in confusion. "What? No, that doesn't make sense." She cocks her head to the side and stares at Carmilla's blank face. "Why would you want to get caught?"

Carmilla, silent once more, presses her lips together into a thin, stubborn line, and goes back to glaring at the floor. Laura contemplates her for a moment longer, then huffs and returns her rummaging. She’s just gonna have to do this the old-fashioned way, then.

 

**Day Six**

“…I cannot believe your twitter password was actually _coolvampire_. I mean, honestly, Carmilla- really?"

The gang’s all here this time, lounging on both beds, with charts and laptops and books scattered across every available surface. LaFontaine is busy tapping away at her laptop, searching Carmilla’s twitter and tumblr accounts for clues about who she’s working with, and where the girls have gone.

Laura feels a momentary twinge of guilt for invading Carmilla’s privacy like this, but she shoves it down. If Carmilla would just _talk _, they would never have had to have done this. It was for the best.__

It was for _Betty_.

With a decisive nod, she goes over behind LaFontaine to look at the screen. “To be fair,” they said, “it did take us almost three days to actually guess _coolvampire_ , so it’s technically a better password than it seems like it would be."

Danny shifted under the mountain of books she had piled on top of herself in defeat, spitting a page out of her mouth and muttering, “That’s only because we assumed she was better at creating a secure online identity than a ten-year-old child, but it seems like we’ve overestimated her intelligence.” She glared at Carmilla, who was slumped against the ropes holding her to the desk chair. “Shocker."

Laura shoves at Danny’s shoulder playfully, then returns to peering over LaFontaine’s shoulder. “It’s weird,” they say, gesturing at the never-ending column of photos and quotes, “I mean, like, there’s a lot of photos of big cats and quotes about philosophy, but none of that is suspicious."

A set of curls suddenly springs up from behind Laura’s headboard, and Perry appears, flailing a rag in the air, “Well, I don’t know what you were expecting, to be honest! It’s not like she’s just going to post ‘Hey I’m a vampire and I’ve been kidnapping co-eds, here’s where I took them’ to her public blog, even if that _is_ what she’s been doing, which _it isn’t_!” Her voice rises dramatically in pitch as she rants, until she’s squeaking in her indignation.

She blushes bright red as everyone turns to stare at her. “I- I mean,” she stutters, “surely there’s another explanation for all of this, right?” The entire room, as one, gives her an incredulous look.

She sighs. “I know, I’m just… look, so far the worst thing we’ve seen—“ she flaps her hand in the general direction of the chair they’ve bound Carmilla to, “ _her_ do herself is be a generally terrible roommate and disrespect the rules of fire safety, and I really don’t think we have the governing authority to, to, to _imprison_ her for that!"

A snort breaks the sudden silence in the room, and Laura whips around to see Carmilla shaking with near-silent laughter. Laura recovers from her shock quickly, and crosses her arms over her chest, tapping her foot impatiently. “Is there something you’d like to share with the class?” she says, attempting to raise her eyebrow condescendingly, even though she knows it mostly makes her look like a frightened rabbit.

It’s the thought that counts. Or something.

Carmilla just laughs ruefully and shakes her head, hair in wild disarray. “Nothing you’d want to hear, dollface,” she drawls, shifting listlessly against the ropes.

“And what is _that_ supposed to mean, you cryptic bloodsucker?” Danny counters, suddenly looming over her, fists clenched.

Carmilla just shakes her head again, curls falling down to cover her eyes, and falls silent.

Laura finally returns to her research, but the rest of the evening is spent with everyone in awkward silence, avoiding each other’s gazes.

 

**Day 10**

"Okay, so, what actually is the deal with all the black?"

Laura's plaintive question comes drifting up from under the pile of bedding she has buried herself beneath as she attempts to process her latest mental breakdown over her supernatural roommate and said roommate's traumatic backstory.

"Like, Is it protective camouflage? Does getting turned into the undead make your wardrobe automatically more gothic? Or is it more of a fitting-in-with-the-clique kind of thing? Or do you just wear it because you know it makes you look hot?" She immediately swallows and falls silent, her last words echoing in the air as she peeks a single eye and reddened cheek out from behind the yellow pillow covering most of her face.

Carmilla, now thankfully pacified by her travel cup of blood but still restrained from escaping the conversation by the ropes and garlic surrounding her, raises a single eyebrow and smirks in Laura's direction as she attempts to burrow further into her burrito of blankets. But soon enough the vampiric B-movie playing on the laptop draws her attention away, and Laura heaves a sigh of relief.

Carmilla bares her teeth in a grin as the black-caped villain bursts into a cloud of squeaking bats, swarming the flaxen-haired ingenue and, completely incidentally, blowing her skirt into the air.

Laura huffs. "And another thing!" she points wildly at the screen, gesturing at the heroine now cowering under the swarm, "can you actually turn into a bat? Or a bunch of bats? If you can turn into a bunch of bats, are all the bats _you_ , or is there like, I don't know, a head bat and the rest of you follows behind? What happens if one of the you-bats dies or gets lost?" She draws a breath and stares at Carmilla with wide eyes. "Oh my god, Carmilla, what if your main bat-self gets eaten - would you come back as half a Carmilla? I don't think I'm prepared to have just half a roommate left, you're hard enough to clean up after as it is and-"

"Whoa, whoa there shortstop," Carmilla drawls, abandoning her straw with a horrifying slurping noise and glancing over at Laura, "Aren't you getting a little ahead of yourself? I can't even turn into one bat, let alone a swarm of them, so I hardly think that will be a problem."

Laura glances away and mumbles, petulantly, "Well, it's not like I'm an expert in this sort of thing, right? Who else am I going to ask, anyway?" She wriggles her way down the bed until she's sitting even with Carmilla's chair. "I mean, I know we had a nice heart-to-heart about your tragic beginnings and all last night, but I still have so many _questions_."

The unimpressed glare she receives from Carmilla is less than encouraging, but she barrels on regardless, pouting plaintively at her and wheedling, "I know, I knowwww, I've already asked you a bunch of questions, but you haven't actually _answered_ most of them! If I promise to never bring out the sock puppets ever ever again, will you just answer a few?" She clasps her hands in front of an unmoved Carmilla's nose, blocking her view of the screen and making her go cross-eyed. "Pleeeeeeease?"

Laura holds the pose for an increasingly awkward moment, before Carmilla finally sighs, "Fine. But!" she warns as Laura pumps her fist and lunges for her notebook, "Don't think I'm doing just because you're curious. It might be the only way to stop my mother."

"Yeah, sure fine," Laura waves her off and emerges from shoving her arm down the side of her bed, lucky pen in hand. "Now, start talking! Question one: crosses - actually effective as an anti-vampiric weapon, or Christian propaganda?"

Carmilla sighs again, but Laura could swear a hint of a smile curls one side of her mouth before she begins to talk.

 

**Day One (of many)**

"Did you actually think I was trying to eat you?"

They're curled up under a set of slightly musty blankets in the loft of a ski cabin somewhere in the border mountains, glowing motes still visible on the horizon out the window, drifting in the air above what's left of the Silas campus. Laura is tucked tightly under Carmilla's chin, wisps of hair tickling her nose, and their legs are tangled together. Carmilla is dragging her fingers up and down Laura's arm, tracing the goosebumps she's leaving behind on each pass.

At Carmilla's question, Laura jerks her head up, a hairsbreadth from concussing herself on Carmilla's chin. "Wait, what?" she sputters, pushed up on one elbow and trying in vain to brush her hair out of her mouth. "What are you talking about?"

Carmilla chuckled, shuffling the quilt back up over Laura's shoulders and tucking her back against her chest. "I'm talking about that time you assumed I was going to eat you! Is it really that hard to believe that I could be flirting with you?"

Laura mumbled something into Carmilla's collarbone, then nuzzled her way up to her neck. Carmilla reached over and brushed Laura's hair away from her face and said, "I will not be distracted that easily, you know," tracing small circles behind Laura's ear to watch her shiver in reaction.

Wrinkling her nose and huffing, Laura relented. "All right, yes, it _is_ difficult to believe, okay? I'm-" she gestured vaguely at her face, her self, "you know, _me_ , and you're... I don't know, blisteringly hot?" She immediately flames up bright red and buries her face back into Carmilla's neck, breath coming fast in embarrassment and tickling across Carmilla's ear.

Carmilla shakes off her reaction and shuffles down to look Laura in the eye, "Hey, hey, Laura. Laura," she said, grabbing Laura's chin to keep her from looking away again. "Laura. You are _amazing_. Frustrating, naïve, and suicidally stubborn, yes, but you are also gorgeous. And hey," she smoothed her thumb over one cheek, chasing the fading redness. "You're right. You are... _you_. And that's why you're perfect."

Laura was smiling now, pressing her cheek into Carmilla's hand and brushing a tentative kiss against her palm. "You mean that?" she breathed.

"Of course I do." Carmilla began carding her fingers through Laura's tangled hair. "With you around, it feels like the sun has come out after a lifetime of grey skies. Why wouldn't that be perfect?"

Laura giggled wetly and wiped her eyes with one palm. "You know," she said turning around so they could both face the window and draping Carmilla's arm back around her torso, "if I told the others what a romantic you are, they'd never believe me."

"And let's keep it that way, shall we?" Carmilla growled in her ear, "I've got a reputation to maintain, _creampuff_."

The sound of Laura's delighted laughter drifted out over the eerily glowing snow long into the night.

 

**The Beginning**


End file.
